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Joke of the Day

"I don't always correct someone's spelling but when I do, I google it first so I don't make an ass of myself."

"Little joke I thought of: What do you call a duck being kidnapped? An abduction. I'll quietly leave through this conveniently placed door."

"Q: What do flies wear on their feet? A: Shoos."

"What do you get when you cross a kid who's eaten enough sugar to send a rocket into orbit, and the meanest boy in the whole world? Hyperbole"

"I've got a conspiracy joke that no one would believe, even though the punchline is in plain sight."

"Bad news from the doctor... Men: Doctor, how is my mother in law? Doctor: I have some bad news. Men: We can take her home, right? Doctor: Yes"

"I went to a cemetery today. The entire time I was there my phone didn't have any service. I must have been in a dead zone."

"A man enters a pun contest... He writes down 10 puns and puts them into a hat thinking at least one of them would win. Sadly, no pun in 10 did."

"Went to an Air & Space museum today, nothing was in there. I asked ""So what's the exhibit?"" & the guy was like ""You're breathing it, man."""

"I like the way the earth revolves! It really makes my day!"