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Joke of the Day

"Dec 21st falls on a Friday... What a sh*tty way to start the weekend.."

"Straight Outta Compton left out Dr. Dreas history of abuse against women Because they didn't want to turn this drama film into a comedy!"

"When the doctor prescribed the millennium a medical dog he was surprised the patient asked ""how do i smoke it"""

"Why was the Redditor mad at Reddit? Because it made her wait seven minutes before posting something."

"What does a barcode say if he bumps into another barcode? SKU me"

"I'm a simple man. I just want to be rich and powerful enough to always get what I want. Nothing more."

"DOCTOR: *stethoscope on my back* Gimme a very slow exhale. ME: EXXXXHHHHHHAAAALLLLLE"

"Omg! Leonardo DeCaprio! Wanna hear a joke about the Oscars? Never mind, you probably won't get it anyways..."

"the dvd logo will hit the corner of the tv screen if you wait 6 hours. thats what i did today. no regrets."

"ME: Did you hear Jack & Cindy got divorced and he's dating someone half his age? HUB: Yep. He's livin the dream ME: HUB: His dream not mine"