128759
Joke of the Day
"Why do Christian figureheads not like science? Because it's about two Adams bonding."
Next Joke
"According to HR, white people aren't issued a race card, and they'd appreciate if I went back to my desk. *shrugs*"
"A small plane crashed into a cemetery... the forensics found no survivors. They have found 268 bodies by sunset. They will continue searching tomorrow morning..."
"AWE YEAH,,, I just washed my dog with Axe body wash... He's gonna to get ALL DA B!TCHES"
"What's the main ingredient in a Jedi martini? Qui-Gon Gin"
"Why are divorces so expensive? Because they are worth it! EDIT: to please all the grammar Nazis of the world"
"I'm despondent. I'm chained to the phone charger. It's so fucking landline."
"I gave a homeless guy some cheese today. I feel gouda 'bout it."
"""Hi I'm looking for a birthday card for my mom's sister"" *hands you an extremely small card* ""WHAT IS THIS A CARD FOR AUNTS"" Yes ""Perfect"""
"I may eat animals, but at least I wait until they're DEAD. Plants are ALIVE, vegans. You disgust me."