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Joke of the Day

"A friend of mine offered to tell me a joke using the UDP protocol, but then warned me I might not get it."

"I was watching a movie with my son the other day. He got scared and asked me, ""Daddy, is that woman really gonna die?"" I said, ""Judging by the size of that horse's cock, yes."""

"Diamonds are a girl's best friend until you realize they turn you into a shallow ho"

"The Hitman A hitman walks out of a bar, and into the elevator of a nearby apartment building. He takes it to the floor that his next ""victim"" lives on. He was hired to kill a Reddito"

"Geppetto: I wish you were a real boy Pinocchio *begins to sing & dance around* Geppetto: yay! [3 hrs later] Geppetto: This was a mistake"

"I used to love going to dinner parties as a little girl My wife hated it though."

"What's Harry Potter's favorite way to go down a hill? Walking...JK, Rolling!"

"I always buy a woman a popsicle on the first date to get a feel for how things might go later."

"God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the earth. Then God made the earth round.....and he laughed and laughed and laughed."

"Being a hypochondriac is going to save my life one of these days"