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Joke of the Day
"""We do not negotiate with Pterodactyls.""- President Barack Obamasaurus"
Next Joke
"*gets crushed by a bus* *checks to see if phone is intact*"
"First thing this morning, there was a tap on my door... My plumber sure has a strange sense of humor..."
"There's both a McDonald's and a blood pressure machine at our Walmart. Circle of life."
"How do you explain a man birthing a baby? Taco bell for lunch"
"What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist."
"I lost the birth video of my son so I'm at the labour ward hoping to recreate it. I'll just zoom in close so my wife won't be able to tell."
"Just got a job opening demanding 13-18 yrs of experience in iOS development. Do they realize that the platform itself is 8 years old?"
"Rosie O'Donnell is such a hipster ...she hated Trump before it was cool."
"A man didn't like his haircut But it started to grow on him"