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Joke of the Day

"Four Worst Feelings Ever: 4. Losing your job 3. Romantic break up 2. Death of a loved one 1. Needing to pee when you're stuck in traffic"

"Hey TV producers! Create a show for white people called ""Brunch Wars"". You're welcome."

"What font is alphabet soup produced in? Times New Ramen"

"What do you say when you walk in on an East Indian woman dressing? Sari!"

"My attempt to write from a woman's perspective: ""She carried her boobs to the station. 'They're staring at my boobs,' she thought boobily."""

"Why does ISIS only drink drip coffee? Because they hate French Press!"

"I'm such a bad golfer, they should send me to Mars. I'm guaranteed to find water."

"Did you hear about the guy who wanted to be reincarnated as a stud? He woke up on a snow tire in Michigan."

"Thank God I wasn't on twitter when I was in college. It would've taken me 65 years to get my degree."

"Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year? A: Because they're sending their turkey to the White House!"