128180

Joke of the Day

"Have you seen how expensive balloons are lately? Bloody inflation."

"WebMD would be more accurate if every search result diagnosed you as a hypochondriac."

"""Lady In Red"" is my favorite song about a guy that's trying to get laid even though he can't remember her goddamn name."

"Why did the blonde call an exterminator? Her computer had a bug..."

"I tried to make my racing snail faster by taking off its shell But that just made it more sluggish"

"""I probably shouldn't have said that out loud"" -a biography"

"Why did the groom want his bride to wear white? He wanted his new dish washer to match his fridge."

"Why does Piglett smell nasty? He plays with Pooh."

"If you think your life is awful my mom keeps track of my ""cycle"" and just told me that I'm ovulating and that I should mingle more."

"I'd tell you the joke about the philosopher but I think only a Nietzsche audience would understand it."