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Joke of the Day
"8/11 Never Forget What? Too Soon?"
Next Joke
"The Whole Foods next to this movie theater is perfect if you want to sneak in your own snacks, but don't want to save a lot of money."
"Why do the Lannisters have such big beds? Because they like to push two twins together to make a king. (Game of Thrones ref)"
"""This is the best acid ever. I totally should write some children's books now."" ~ Dr. Seuss"
"Sometimes... You just gotta treat life like a bad lay... Make funny faces and pretend you're having a good time."
"So this guy walks into a bar... JOHN CENA! LIVE AT SUUUUUUUUUPER SLAAM!"
"My love for you is like diarrhea I just can't hold it in"
"*sees neighbors bringing in KFC *knocks on door Have you seen my dog she got out *teary eyed Neighbor: Aw. No, but if there's- Some KFC?"
"Once I came across a bridge that was half concrete and half covered in asphalt It was a real hybridge."
"I need help, my wife was killed in a hit and run.. Why would someone drive through the kitchen?"