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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes... You just gotta treat life like a bad lay... Make funny faces and pretend you're having a good time."

"What did the mountain climber name his horse? Everest. Any time he is bored I see him Mount Everest."

"Lost my pet unicorn. If you find it, please share your drugs."

"Yo momma's so dense, she got a job at NASA... ..bending light."

"What is most popular hearthstone deck in Germany? Patron Warrior because Everyone Get in Here"

"Why Couldn't the Billionaire Fit through the circular door? He was too eccentric."

"I got my kid a puppy as a present, but it died before Christmas... FML, now I'm stuck taking care of a puppy. Edit: For those worried about the kid, it's ok. He was an adopted ginger, so no big deal."

"I bet parents get annoyed when their kids ask ""are we there yet?"" when they're fully aware they now live in a car"

"Whats the worst thing about the deaf women being raped She didn't hear them cumming"

"2 fish are in a tank The one asks, ""how do you shoot this?"""