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Joke of the Day

"I think High School birth control classes should just be forcing the students to watch videos of me taking my 3 kids to the grocery store"

"As a European, I was always troubled by 2 Girls 1 Cup. Just how much is that in grams?"

"What do you call a bass player without a GF? Homeless."

"Life with me baby is like a rollercoaster It's got a weight restriction. (Stolen from a mock the week episode)"

"I saw the funniest joke on television the other day. It was Hillary Clinton's campaign. I couldn't stop laughing."

"If you're asking me to choose sides, I'll always choose potato salad."

"I dated a lesbian who thought she might be bi, but I was afraid to make the first move. Felt like a pussy the first time she kissed me."

"A hole was discovered in the fence of a nudist community. Police are looking into it."

"My kid's latest report card looks like someone with a stutter is trying to swear."

"What do windows feel when they get hurt? Pane!"