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Joke of the Day

"sometimes i call watermelons summer pumpkins and nobody ever knows what im talking about."

"Why was the tree stretching? So it could be timber!"

"On a scale of 1 to Osama... How good was the hiding spot?"

"My heart goes out to the teenage girls in California who, due to the drought, can no longer take ""unusually long"" baths like we did"

"10 bucks says Kanye signed the guest book at his own wedding."

"What's the only Pokemon that doesn't evolve? Any black Pokemon, really."

"I wish conversations were like user agreements where I could skip to the end and just agree."

"It's no superpower but I'm pretty good at winding down my car window without moving my arm so it looks like I have power windows."

"What did the father buffalo say to his son going off to college? Bison."

"Why did the man fall off his bike Because someone threw a fridge at him"