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Joke of the Day

"Went to the doctor today and my many years of phone sex has finally caught up with me. I have hearing AIDS now."

"News: Hillary won the debate! My friends: Bernie won the debate! Trump: I won the debate! Huckabee: Asian people eat dogs!"

"My girlfriend and I are fighting over my recent hair loss... I really hope it's just a rough patch"

"Technically all breakfasts are continental, unless you eat them in the ocean."

"The showerhead and shower curtain are complaining. Curtain says: I really hate having to just hang here all day. Showerhead: At least you dont get turned on everytime you see a naked person!"

"What's a orphans favorite ice cream flavor? Banana Foster"

"Did you hear about the war on diarrhea? It started out as a smear campaign, but ended up being a real shitshow."

"If 5 black slaves had sex... Is it considered a threesome? I'm going to hell for this."

"Conservatives say the problem is Christianity ain't taught in schools. The real problem is Christianity ain't taught in church."

"When life hands you a komodo dragon suddenly the times you got lemons seem pretty cool."