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Joke of the Day

"How do you turn a duck into a popular soul singer? Stick it in microwave and turn it on until it's Bill Withers."

"I'm making a documentary... I'm making a controversial documentary that reveals decades of covered-up sexual misconduct in youth tennis programs across the country. It's called *15 - Love*."

"Why did we skip windows 9? Because 7 8 9 I'm so sorry"

"Looking Forward by Felix Ited"

"Bad news: I just stepped on the cat. Even worse news: I think I just created a Nicki Minaj song."

"How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? By rearranging the furniture."

"I was depressed last night so I called a self-help phone line... Got a call centre in Afghanistan, and told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck..."

"Jesus Was Born In The Middle East... Why'd you think he was white?"

"Cheesy joke Cheddar"

"A murderer, sitting in the electric chair, was about to be executed. ""Have you any last requests? asked the chaplain. ""Yes,"" replied the murderer. ""Will you hold my hand?"""