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Joke of the Day

"What's easier to unload, a truck full of bowling balls or a truck of babies? The babies of course, you can use a pitchfork!"

"I have Note 7...I have a charger....ugh... Bomb has been planted."

"Your teeth are like the stars Yellow and separated."

"My New Years resolution is to not make a New Years resolution. I figure I am going to fuck it up anyway... I may as well do it from the start."

"I had to break up with my cross-eyed girlfriend today. She was seeing other people."

"I met a girl at a soccer game... ...I think she's a keeper"

"Teacher: Why do you want to work in a bank Alan? Fred: 'Cuz there's money in it sir."

"""Hey sorry Im overprotective, guess I just get nervous since I watched OUR FAMILY GET MURDERED!"" -What the dad on Finding Nemo shouldve said"

"What do you call a smelly fellow that makes bad jokes? Pungent"

"Why do cannabis smokers call that tiny device that holds the butt of a cigarette a roach-clip? ...because ""pot holder"" was already taken."