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Joke of the Day

"I keep forgetting the ""o"" part of ""Hello."" My boss is NOT happy with the way I've been answering his phone."

"How do you keep an idiot in suspense? I'll post the answer in the comments."

"""First off I want to wish my opponent the best of luck and oh god. OH GOD NO"" - presidential candidate accidentally using their 3rd wish"

"How long does it take King Zora to move out of your way? A week, a week, a week, a week, a week, a week."

"If I had a dollar every time a woman called me handsome... I would employ lots of woman whose sole job will be to call me handsome."

"A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi are on a sinking ship. The pastor yells ""Save the children!"" The rabbi replies ""Pft, fuck the children!"" The priest says ""Do you think we have time?"""

"So a guy comes into a bar... oh wait or was it a horse? Ok so a guy cums into a horse. yaaa obviously works better as a spoken joke"

"""Hey is BB hungry?"" ""No BB-8."""

"How do the Chinese name their children They drop silverware in the sink and listen to the sound it makes"

"What did the Mexican fire chief name his two sons? Jose and Hose B"