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Joke of the Day

"Which is the best side of a banana to eat? The Inside..."

"Stupid funny One time Back when I use to be an auto mechanic I drove around in an Italian car. The car kept telling me to add oil but I never did and one day the car exploded killing every body."

"Teen: Your brows are on fleek! Me: (confused) Yeah well your FACE is on fleek. Teen: Thanks! Me: God damn it."

"[alarm clock goes off] ok it's happening again it's a day and it's here again *googling* day again why how to unsubscribe days"

"What is the only deaf animal? Def Leppard"

"My dick is so big that if I laid it out on a keyboard, it would go from A to Z. Wait, shit."

"Which Disney character is Trump's favorite? WALL-E"

"Autocorrect just changed 'so thirsty' to 'sloth irate' and I'm slowly getting angry about it."

"Did you know this about Jared from Subway? He lost 250 pounds eating their sandwiches."

"If your kid texts you questions about the price of replacing any household item, you will be replacing said item."