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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a cat and a comma? One has its claws at the end of its paws, and one is a pause at the end of a clause."

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"Gf: come over Me: can't, playing the new call of duty Gf: my parents are out of town Me: you're 30 years old, grow up"
"Kid: Just bought a chicken, a bar, a door with no doorbell and a doctors surgery Man: Where did you buy all that junk? Kid: At the Joke shop."
"Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing."
"""Why do white people like cheese so much?"" Because they're made from cultures! Edit: Five BLM members disliked this post."
"Studies show that one in two and a half men are HIV Positive You can thank Charlie Sheen for that"
"Yesterday, I got a fortune cookie that said: ""Help! I'm stuck in a cookie factory!!!"""
"Helping a friend So I got a text from my friend this morning telling me he was going to kill himself. Do I reply? Or just leave him hanging."
"Yo Mama so poor... ...that when she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken she licks other people's fingers."
"Wife asked what was on the TV... I said ""dust"". That's when the fight started."