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Joke of the Day

"There were nine sides, but after one left they got closer. We will always remember their prime, even if it is now Octogone"

"Two cannibals are eating a clown, one turns to the other and asks 'does this taste funny to you?' Ba da ba, tshhhh."

"What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles!"

"I just saved $30 on Taco Bell by telling a friend I don't have my wallet"

"I'll never have the conviction of a jogger who runs in place while waiting for the red light to turn."

"my hate for filling up ice cube trays outweighs my love for cold beverages."

"How do you get rid of an itch? Start from scratch."

"It was definitely Adam and Steve - what kind of straight man hangs out in a garden??"

"Just once I'd like to see a celebrity show up to the red carpet in jeans and be like, ""Oh, was this today? I was just in the neighborhood."""

"Before I buy a leaf blower I want to make sure I understand the rules. We just blow the leaves at each other's houses, right?"