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Joke of the Day
"There are three ways a man wears his hair - parted- unparted or departed"
Next Joke
"Not quite feeling myself today. I'm going to see if booze helps..."
"I've been running around screaming at random people that I've lost my virginity. I'm starting to regret naming my dog that."
"Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them."
"[therapy session] THERAPIST: ok...I totally respect your feelings & you sound genuine...but that was just the plot of Jurassic Park ME: nuh uh"
"If you want to intimidate anyone with your screaming and honking, you may need to rethink those reindeer antlers on your car."
"Don't have phone sex.... You could get hearing aids."
"Why is 6 afraid of 9 on New Years Eve? Because 9, 8, 7...."
"Wanna hear a construction joke? Oh wait, I'm working on it"
"What kind of phone makes music? A saxophone."