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Joke of the Day

"Why does the left foot get all the blame if you're a poor dancer? ""Oh, you have two left feet. Hur hur hur"" I guess it is #rightprivilege"

"Why was John Lennon shocked when he got his wife's gynecologist bill? He had misunderstood the doctor when he said ""I do probe Ono."""

"People are writing condolences on my Grandma's Facebook that sound more like Yelp reviews of her. Great woman, very loving, 5/5 stars"

"How can one get rid of the echo while playing a movie? Get some furniture"

"Why can't you trick an aborted baby? Because it wasn't born yesterday."

"What happens when the president of the United States has to use the bathroom? The state of alert in the White House rises to Defecate 2."

"How do you call unexpected pregnancy in German? Kinder Surprise"

"My girlfriend announced she was having her sports car detailed ""I am going to have them wax it too,"" she said. I looked at her nonplussed and said, ""I didn't know Corvettes had a bikini line."""

"Where on LinkedIn do I add my current gang memberships"

"Dumb blondes Why does a dumb blonde have a deep bellybutton? They probably have dumb boyfriends too !"