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Joke of the Day

"How come an extremely angry woman can pack everything she owns in an hour, but it takes her a week to pack for vacation?"

"Saying ""Sloppy seconds"" instead of ""leftovers"" is really funny, until your five year old says it."

"Girl, you're like speeding in a construction zone... Double Fine"

"""ARE YOU IN THERE LOOKING AT GUYS STARING AT THEIR COMPUTERS AGAIN?!?!"" - porn's parents"

"Robin and Batman Robin: Knock Knock Batman:Who's there? Robin:NOT YOUR PARENTS!"

"NSSSA -National Stutter Association."

"I like my women like my wine, 12 years old and Locked in a cellar Edit: u wot m8 I fixed grammar"

"What do you get when you throw a baby against a wall? An erection"

"[answers phone in crowded elevator] give me some good news...HOW contagious?"

"I just bought bunk beds. The other night I brought a date home. She said, ""I'll get on top."" I said, ""Great, I'll get the ladder."" She said, ""You sure think a lot of yourself, don't you?"""