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Joke of the Day

"Life keeps reminding me that I have no idea what I'm doing"

"What's a pirate's favorite Antivirus? Avast."

"Did you hear about the guy who froze himself? I hear he is 0K!"

"Why don't Jews like to give rim jobs? Because it's too close to the gas chamber. I'll show myself out"

"I think Marco Rubio has spine issues. Every time someone says Marco, someone says POLIO"

"I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my ass."

"What do you get when you cross an ape with a calculator? A Hairy Reasoner. (Andy Rooney used to enjoy this one)"

"I had a normal childhood My mom only jerked me off once when I broke my arm, no more than that!"

"I wrote to the Bank: ""My Cheque was returned with remark 'Insufficient funds'. I want to know whether it refers to mine or the Bank?"""

"I made a butchers club The only problem is we can't agree to a meating time."