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Joke of the Day

"I never would've noticed that you removed me as a friend, until you tried to add me back."

"I never date girls from china... That's a big red flag."

"I watched Batman with a girl on our 9th date. It went ""dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner BATMAN!"""

"What do you call it when Usain Bolt is standing next to your mom? A runner in scoring position."

"Do you know how we know that Santa Claus is married? Because he only comes once a year! Merry Christmas. P.S. I'm sure this joke has been told somewhere but just in case someone hasn't heard it."

"What do you call a lesbian Pakistani? Minge eater"

"They say jokes lessen tragedy Is that why my parents became comedians after having me?"

"Relationship status: -Applies sunscreen to wall. -Rubs back on wall."

"How does the farmer count up his cows? ...with a cowculator."

"Hi folks, this is your captain speaking. How crazy is it that we're about to FLY. I still can't get over it. Wow. How does that even work."