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Joke of the Day
"I'm writing a book about reverse psychology.. Please don't buy it."
Next Joke
"March Into Battle by Sally Forth"
"whenever my mom criticizes me i yell ""it's probably genetic"" and run out of the room as fast as i can"
"Sean Connery: A Man Who Conquers All *obviously, this is read in the man's grizzled voice* What's the difference between your mother and a motorcycle? When I ride a motorcycle... I wear protection."
"I almost hit a deer tonight. But then he took back what he said about my mom and we hugged it out. Back to having zero haters, feels good."
"Black Super Mario *Jumps on mushroom* *Throws fireball at turtle* *Slides down sewer pipe* *Arrested for assault, arson, and trespass*"
"What do you call a dog that is also a magician? A Labracadabrador."
"Why did Ellen Pao try to sue the users of Reddit for gender discrimination/ sexual harassment? Because they were forming a massive circle-jerk around her"
"Why is Monica Lewinsky going to vote Republican this year? Last time she tried Democrat it left a bad taste in her mouth."
"*quietly tries to open a bag of chips while son walks around looking for his bag of chips*"