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Joke of the Day

"Mom: (weeping) Son...your Grandpa...he...he... He, overdosed on viagra... (sobs) Dad: i'm sure this i HARD for you... (Not my joke heard this and died laughing, had to share)"

"Justin Bieber is still truly Canadian at heart... His most popular song is called ""Sorry""."

"Give a man a fish, sickening him with botulism which spreads rapidly, people begin dying in droves, STACKS OF CORPSES BLOT OUT THE SUN."

"What's long and hard every time you wake up? Getting out of bed. You never feel like it making hard to get up and you usually take a long time to."

"I asked my gf to get the paper for me... ...She said ""Don't be silly, borrow my iPad"". That spider never knew what hit it."

"What is tangled rope in space called? Astro-knot"

"What's 20 feet long and smells like piss? It's a line dance at the old folks home..."

"Where do frogs come from? They're German and a tad-polish"

"Satan: you can spend eternity in hell OR you can go to work for the first time in 5 days. Me: hmmm Satan: well? Me: IM THINKING, DAMN IT"

"My favorite Irish Joke. Two Irish men walk out of a bar."