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Joke of the Day

"[homocide scene] DETECTIVE:""my god, in my 25 years on the force i've never seen a dead ghost."" COP:""sir?, we covered the body with a sheet."""

"What's the difference between a muffin and a jew? a muffin doesn't scream when you put it in an oven."

"First time I saw a dry erase board I said thats ""remarkable"""

"Hello I'm Janardhan and I just had sex with a hedgehog. It was a little prickly at first but then I stopped masturbating and just went for it."

"When does a cub scout become a boy scout? When he eats his first brownie."

"Broken Window Wife: You need to fix the bathroom window, then neighbor can see me every time I shower. Husband; I know, he saw you and called me to tell me he's paying for the window repair."

"Girl: So, your dating profile says you enjoy long walks by the sea & making ur own wine? Jesus: ON Girl: What? Jesus: Long walks ON the sea"

"Why shouldn't you have coffee while on the clock? Because that would be ""grounds"" for termination!"

"Why won't the witch let the traveling pig actors into her gingerbread cottage? She's afraid they'll bring down the house."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Alickalotopuss"