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Joke of the Day

"I met Mike Tyson and he had his tiger with him. I said, ""Wow! I can't believe you actually have a tiger! I thought that was a myth."" He said, ""Well you were mythtaken."""

"I broke up with my girlfriend, who is an Optometrist She meant well, but she was just too annoying in bed. She was always saying, ""So, do you like it better like this.... or like this?"""

"How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? You staple food to the ceiling."

"Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? It took her a month to realize she could play it at night..."

"Did you hear about the haunted burlesque theater? Things went bump and grind in the night."

"What did the baby chick say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange ? 'Dad dad look what marma-laid' !"

"Your ""poetic"" tweets would be so much better if Adele hadn't thought of them first"

"If a cop tazed me and then yelled ""Raiden Wins!""... I would instantly lose all animosity towards him."

"How can you tell if someone has Alzheimer's? A. How can you tell if someone has Alzheimers?"

"Science Jokes Thread on AskReddit! For your amusement: http://en.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1auxsf/what_are_some_funny_scientific_jokes_that_you_know/"