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Joke of the Day

"tits What does one saggy tit say to another saggy tit? ""If we keep on sagging like this, they might think we're nuts!"""

"What's the difference between Jews and Pizzas? Pizzas don't scream in the oven. *Preparing self For the downvotes/Report*"

"I've got a new aardvark. Would you like to play with him? I don't really know. I've heard it growling it doesn't sound very friendly. Does it bite? That's what I want to find out."

"Boy, people who need attention continue to find new ways to get it, he tweeted."

"I bought a second hand deck of cards from a casino in Las Vegas, but after 4 weeks they hadn't arrived. When I asked for an update, they said they were still dealing with my order"

"I feel sorry for people who's middle names start with V... Their first and last names are always fighting."

"Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a deck of cards Just sit down and I'll deal with you later"

"Why did the toilet make a joke about the balls? It was low hanging fruit."

"The worst feeling is when you miss someone but you can't even tell them you miss them because they are a pizza."

"My garden shed door keeps opening and closing. Is it the wind? Yes. Am I going to tell my kids it's haunted so they stay out? Also yes."