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Joke of the Day

"What is an astronomer? A night watchman with a college education."

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"If I had a daycare, I think it would be awesome to get each kid to wear one of those backpack-leash things and make them pull me on a sled."
"What do you call your Mexican crush? Juan Andonle"
"Q.How can you tell when a Chicago Fireman is dead? A. The remote control slips from his hand."
"A boy and a gorilla walk into a bar... The boy says ""first shot's on me"" The gorilla replies ""nah, I got this"""
"What plant attacks people? An Ambush ;)"
"Longest joke in the world (source) http://longestjokeintheworld.com"
"Rest in peace boiled water You will be mist."
"I like my women with curves. Lots and lots of curves. In a sort of spiral shape, maybe with ketchup. Curly fries. I like curly fries"
"I plucked my first gray hair today. The lady it came from got so mad you guys."