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Joke of the Day

"Where was the NSAs wire taps when the McCallisters were leaving messages w all the neighbors that Kevin was abandoned & alone? Thanks Obama."

"My Nana's ninety three, but she's living the dream. The one where you go out in just your underwear and your teeth fall out."

"What happens when you witness a shipwreck? You let it sink in."

"so i was on youtube... and people started making jokes here's the link. http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=V7-XLL3nbYU&feature=fvwp great song too"

"What comes in little cans? Red Bull and Priests."

"For the last time I said CAULK, I need black CAULK. This isn't funny, what isle is it in"

"Yo moma is so old she knew the Great Wall of China when it was just ok"

"What goes great with Alphabet Soup? Times New Ramen"

"What did the whistleblower say after the blizzard in Russia? I'm Snowden!"

"Never have sex after getting a concussion. It's fucking confusing."