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Joke of the Day

"Gang tip: If a rival gang tags their symbol on your turf, don't cover it. Add a drawing of Calvin peeing on it. Now who's stupid? They are!"

"How are Harambe and the iPhone the same? it only took one extra hole to kill them both"

"a toast to wives...girlfriends and lovers... may they never meet..."

"Most serial killers are men. That's because women prefer to kill just one man, over a period of many, many years."

"My kid threatened to hold his breath until i gave him dessert He's now passed out on the floor. I don't negotiate with terrorists."

"[Biblical Times] God: oh shit Angel: what? God: I just realized I've been leaning on the frog button."

"Son: How much does it cost to get married Dad? Father: I don't know son I'm still paying for it."

"Photosynthesis is the process used by plants to convert a picture into a thousand words"

"Why do girls have nipples? Because without them tits would be pointless."

"""When no one else will f*ck you, I'm always there."" Life"