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Joke of the Day

"I swear to drunk I'm not God, but seriously, stay in drugs, eat school, and don't do vegetables."

"A racist man laments... If people gave him $1 for every racist thing he said or done he'd be able to make a small contribution of 1 million dollars to Donald Trump's campaign."

"What body part is most sensitive to a man while he is masturbating? His ears."

"Driving I was driving in the city, when I got the Sun in my eyes. Damn Paparazzi."

"Happy birthday to rapper Pitbull who is 34 today, or 238 in dog years for all the other Pitbulls."

"A friend asked if I thought there was alien life on other planets and I was like don't give up hope, there's someone out there for you"

"A man walks into the head office of a click-bait news site... ...what happens next will shock you!!!"

"What did the host of an orgy say to his guests? I'm glad you all came!"

"Take my wife, Please!"

"I had a bowl of Cap'n Crunch cereal for the first time in a long time last weekend. The roof of my mouth should be healed in a few days."