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Joke of the Day

"If I have 5 apples and Jamal take 3, what color is Jamal? Admit it, you're a fucking racist!"

"What kind of pants do Bostonians wear? Car Keys"

"If I had a dollar every time a woman called me handsome... I would have one dollar... thanks mom..."

"If every day is a gift, I'd have to say today was a Fruitcake from Last Year Day. Recycled, disappointing and held together by booze."

"Whenever Becky says anything in the breakroom, I just say, ""well, that got racist pretty fast"" and walk out. I hate you so much, Becky."

"I'm tired of being told to remove my card rapidly. Starting a new ATM for people who wanna remove their card at a more chill pace"

"They say one friend out of every group has the potential to be a serial killer So I pushed Steve off a cliff, just in case it was him."

"What does Mr Miyagi call his cat Mr Meow'y"

"What did the man say when the lobster gave him food poisoning? I'm not letting you cook dinner again"

"Mr. Buffalo: I caught my son making out with a girl Me: SWEET! Mr. Buffalo: And a boy Me: So, I guess you could say he's your... Bi-son"