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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a hockey player and a hippie chick? The hockey player takes a shower after three periods."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Ari ! Ari who ? Ari-S-P-E-C-T !"

"A magician says to his wife to 'Pick a card. Any card.' She takes his credit card and leaves."

"What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? You only need one nail to hang a picture! Happy Easter!"

"What do an elephant and a Porsche 911 have in common? They both have their trunks in the front."

"Why is Santa so jolly? ...Because he knows where all the bad girls live!"

"I went out for dinner last night. The Captain's Basket was on special for $7.00. I tried it just for the halibut."

"Irish Problems.... Q:How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man? A: None! (potato famine) Old one, i did not make, nor do i take any credit."

"*posts selfie with full makeup and 3 filters* Caption: I'm so sick, I feel like dog crap & I look sooooo gross"

"Why does Dr. Pepper come in a can ? His wife died."