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Joke of the Day
"I'm not transphobic, I used to play with toy locomotives all the time!"
Next Joke
"Every day I spend a few hours on a running track. Next week I might even turn it on."
"A guy calls his local butchery... - Do you have chicken paws? - Yes - Do you have chicken wings? - Yes, I do - Do you have pig's head? - Sure - You must look really funny then"
"Last supper *at the last supper* *Jesus breaks bread* this is my body *pours wine* this is my blood *opens jar of mayo* Judas: I'm just going to stop you right there...."
"A programming genius named Sewter Built a limerick-writing computer The metre was fine And the rhymes quite divine But for some reason it always got the last line wrong"
"What's the hardest thing, being in a room full of sexy people? my dick"
"How much longer? Did you bring any snacks? They want $5 for M&M's! I wanna go home Is it over yet? - me watching my kids Christmas pageant"
"I like my sex the way I like my tweets. Forced and meaningless."
"What type of store doesn't move? A stationary store."
"Ladies, if you give men a choice between two things we'll pick the first. We stopped listening and didn't hear the second."