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Joke of the Day
"My friend went to a salon and asked them to straighten his hair. So they took out his highlights."
Next Joke
"Did you hear about the cannibal who came home late for dinner? All he got was a cold shoulder."
"[24hr news channel] news just in.. *director repeats himself into headset* news justin *justin just sits there* READ THE NEWS JUSTIN"
"What's the difference between Hitler and a marathon runner? The marathon runner can successfully finish a race"
"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's not enough to change the bulb; we have to change the *system*."
"A new energy drink called F5 just came out, It's super refreshing!"
"Have you seen the news about the Seamus Costello Celebrity sex tape? It's all about the star he ploughs."
"You know you've seen too many walking dead episodes when your hand gets stung by a bee and you start screaming for everyone to cut it off"
"With a stolen credit card, who WOULDN'T go straight to Wendy's to get 2 Double Stacks and a small Sprite? So thanks for asking for ID, lady."
"A grenade isin't the only thing i'd catch for you bby. :^)"