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Joke of the Day

"E-mail Addresses Are Kinda Like Underwear... If you don't change them often enough they'll get full of shit"

"Whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine."

"Me: Yeah like that, baby. Him: *caresses my back, plays with my hair* Me: *moans* Him: *growls* I'm gonna do so many-- Me: *snores, drools*"

"The key to success is sincerity... Once you can fake that, you're golden."

"Doctor: Did you take the patient's temperature? Nurse: No. Is it missing?"

"What did the dad buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? Bison"

"Saw a group of ants carrying a Funyun and it made me wish my friends and I had a giant Funyun."

"What do you call a Mexican guy with one rubber toe? Roberto"

"What do you say to a virgin when she sneezes? Goes-in-tight!"

"What is black, white, and red all over? The Ferguson riots"