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Joke of the Day
"I refuse to text and drive... I always end up spilling my beer."
Next Joke
"A three legged puppy walks into a bar The puppy looks at everyone in the bar and says, I'm looking for the man that shot my paw."
"You ever lied so much on a resume, you're actually shocked that they gave you the job? I mean look at me, do I look like an astronaut?"
"It's amazing the things you'll do for a person when you want to see them naked."
"Was watching a fetish video and it cut to the guy at the last second I think I got off on the wrong foot."
"At the South Pole by Anne Tarctic"
"What do women and dog turds have in common? The older they get the easier they are to pick up."
"Son:Dad, what is 'creeping inflation'? Father:It's when your mother starts out asking for new shoes and ends up with a complete new outfit."
"A baby mouse is out for a walk one day and sees a bat... He quickly runs home to his mother and says ""Mummy! Mummy! I just saw an angel!"""
"Scared the postman by going to the door naked. I'm not sure what scared him more, my naked body or the fact that I knew where he lived."