120035
Joke of the Day
"You know what they say about location in real estate? Not much but they say it three times."
Next Joke
"Why do people starve? When food tastes so good."
"How many of you have awakened with your spouse holding your hand only to find they are putting your thumb on your iPhone trying to break in?"
"There's an app to show who's unfollowed you lately? Damn, that sounds depressing. If my number drops I just assume it's because they died."
"What does a little sister ride? A nii san"
"Keep an identical glass of vodka next to the water on your bedside table for a refreshing morning game of Russian Roulette"
"Why does it take 100 mink to make a fur coat? Because they are lazy and have small hands!"
"My mind: ""Today was a productive day."" My body: ""Please don't drink 11 cups of coffee again.""..."
"Why did the boy drop his icecream? He was hit by a truck."
"Some schools are banning Santa so they don't offend non-Christian students. That sucks, because Santa is my favorite part of the Bible."