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Joke of the Day

"Today my girlfriend yelled today saying: ""You weren't even listening just now, were you?"" What a weird way to start a conversation."

"Stop making jokes about gay guys. Come on guys. im also fucking serious guys. its so *hard* making gay jokes and hoping you wont get lower karma, butt fuck it."

"Did you hear about the failed Indian musician? He was hoisted by his own sitar."

"What do you get when you give a head of lettuce to an epileptic? A seizure salad."

"A train station is where a train stops... A train station is where a train stops, a bus station is where a bus stops, now you know why they call it a work station"

"My girlfriend told me to stop listening to Oasis I said maybe.."

"How does a dishwasher make his money? Panhandling"

"I was scared shitless when I found out I was constipated."

"Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink"

"Xbox One down! PS4 Down! Get an ambulance! Wii U! Wii U! Wii U!"