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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a stupid asshole? Ignoranus"

"What do you get if you cross history and a cow? A moo-suem."

"One night I dreamt that I was a muffler... I woke up exhausted."

"What's AlQaeda's favorite football team? The New York Jets"

"For everyone that works in a restaurant, or uses shredded cheese, Don't vote for trump! He wants to make America grate again!"

"What do you call a dictionary on drugs? High definition Edit: Thanks Reddit for the upvotes, I'm glad you guys finally liked something that I posted. Thanks internet!"

"We can play Yahtzee again. -You fixed the broken dice? Yeah. And they'll never break again. -How do you know? *grins* Die mends are forever."

"Why can't you hear rabbits having sex in the woods? They have cotton balls!"

"*travels back in time to kill Hitler as a baby* *becomes known as time-traveling baby murderer & history's greatest monster*"

"The biggest joke of 2015.. When you have Donald Trump, Hilary Clinton, and Deez Nuts running for President."