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Joke of the Day

"What does this joke's punchline & a 50 foot penis have in common? You can see them coming from miles away."

"Me (said to my friend over the phone): ""Is it just me... ...or is someone walking behind me""? Friend: ""No, it's just you""."

"I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick pocketed... How could anyone stoop so low?"

"A black man, muslim, and an illegal alien walk into a bar... And the bartender asks ""What are you having Mr. President?"""

"According to the police, public masturbation is not considered a ""street performance"". Even if you have a hat on the ground on front of you."

"What's worse than a lobster on your piano? What's worse than a lobster in your piano? A CRAB on your organ."

"Went to WalMart today and still had all my kids when I got home. Next week, I'll try harder."

"I had an ex-girlfriend who was rather big, and she possessed an unusual talent; she was ambidextrose - she could polish off a box of chocolates with either hand."

"Why did the console gamer cross the road? To render the other side."

"Has anyone seen the new Ebola video ? I heard it went viral."