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Joke of the Day

"My best joke Cloid"

"What did Matthew McConaughey say when he saw this year's Oscar nominees? All white, all white, all whiiiiiiiite..."

"I could win the Nobel Peace Prize and not feel as accomplished as I do when I successfully put together something from Ikea."

"My math teacher called me average. How mean!"

"Did you hear about the first time Alexander The Great went to a brothel? He came, he saw, he came."

"Hey, did you guys know you can do just about anything if you use asterisks? *rides T-Rex off into the sunset*"

"Anyone you can do, I can do better.."

"Sorry for nicking your car w/my door, but you didn't leave much room. It's small, but I circled it with my key so you could find it."

"I ran into my ex the other day, hit reverse, and ran into him again."

"Why is Vanilla Ice scratching his head? Lice. Lice, maybe."