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Joke of the Day

"What's it called when a super model wants to date an accountant? Wishful thinking. Obviously"

"Last night I tried to go out for an Italian Meal, but there was a huge, fat woman standing in the doorway. I couldn't get pasta."

"My damn neighbours bang on the walls at all hours of the night It's so bad sometimes that i can hardly hear myself practising the drums"

"Me: Hi, what's a good school binder for my 10yo girl here? Clerk: Trapper Keeper? Me: Haha, no, she's my own daughter."

"A donkey falls into a bowl of sugar... Now, that's a sweet ass."

"Has anyone woken up Green Day yet?"

"Apparently saying, ""You mad, bro?"" is frowned upon if you work in customer service."

"A baptist priest with a huge boner walks into a bar The bartender says ""what can i get you?"" ""anything 12 years old that goes down nicely"", says the priest."

"What do you call an artist in a dark alley? Sketchy"

"I put the 'fun' in 'dyslexic'."