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Joke of the Day

"How does Moses make tea? He brews it."

"How are tornadoes and marriage alike? They both begin with a lot of sucking and blowing, and in the end you lose your house."

"My boss just fired me because I spent the past 45 minutes taking a crap. I don't see why he can't just clean it off his desk, and move on."

"My favorite game with the kids is one where I play dead until they go around to their dad's side of the bed and wake him up."

"In ""Come As You Are"", Kurt Cobain kept repeating ""And I swear that I don't have a gun""... ...he lied."

"About four minutes into any run I decide to work on my personality instead."

"I hope my neighbors follow me on Twitter cause their car's lights are on."

"How we know that God is not an engineer When designing the human body, an engineer would not run a sewer line through a recreational area."

"Did you hear about the kindergartener with a bad knee? He needed a kid knee transplant."

"Take my advice I'm not using it."