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Joke of the Day
"What would Martin Luther King be if he was white? Alive. He would be alive."
Next Joke
"I thought about getting silk sheets to seem sexy, but then I realized nobody would be turned on by me falling out of bed 6 times a night."
"Had to Return the Sensitive Toothpaste I bought yesterday... It couldnt take a joke!"
"Italian names sound delicious. Even Mussolini, sounds like a fried cheese that ends up oppressing your digestive process. #Italians"
"I spilled spot-remover on my dog... ...and now he's gone. :("
"What did the escalator say to the elevator? Nothing, he just staired."
"""Well, I guess I'll stagger around, speak gibberish, & touch all the shit I'm not supposed to while you get irritated."" Drunks & toddlers."
"Q: Did you hear about the bulimic bachelor party? A: The cake came out of the girl."
"[at work] Carl, did you get naked when you used the bathroom? *standing there with his shirt & pants on backwards* ""No...why do you ask?"""
"Why does China have such a large population??? Because their condoms were Made in China."