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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between pink and purple? The grip."

"I could never be a detective. I can't even solve equations, let alone crimes."

"""It's funny how red, white, and blue represents freedom until it's your rear view mirror flashing behind you."""

"Did you hear about the great Alphabet war of 1938? The last letter of the alphabet declared war on all the not-zs."

"I just broke up with my girlfriend. It's okay though she said we could still be cousins!"

"I say we give them 1 more day and if they can't come to an agreement then we initiate the 1st U.S. Hunger Games."

"How did the hipster burn their tongue? They drank their tea before it was cool."

"I forgot I had an ambien in my back pocket Now my ass is asleep"

"Q: How do librarians file melted marshmallows? A: According to the Gooey Decimal System."

"What's the difference between America and Yoghurt? If you leave yoghurt alone for 2000 years it'll develop a culture."