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Joke of the Day

"A beautiful lady once asked me what I like in a woman. I got six months for indecent exposure."

"What every man wants to hear after sex:"

"Why Snoop Dogg can't eat a hotdog... Because he drops it like it's hot!"

"What do miss Frizzle and the catholic church have in common? They've both been in little boys."

"If someone doesn't respond to your text within 5 minutes, they obviously don't love you anymore. Probably never did, react accordingly."

"INTERVIEWER: strengths? ME: I'm good at presenting both sides of an argument INTERVIEWER: great ME: which could also be a weakness..."

"What is one item which has never been affected by inflation? Deer's Balls There are always under a buck"

"Whats the difference between a Chickpea and a Lentil? No one ever paid $50 to have a Lentil on their face."

"Vine is shutting down I might actually make more in a year than a vine star does in a week."

"I can't help but feel that if Mario hadn't been taking so many mushrooms he would have found the right castle rather quickly.."