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Joke of the Day

"12: I hate school. Me: Hey! Perk up! Years from now you'll look back on this as the best time of your life! 12: Now you're just being mean"

"This dumbass next to me on the highway is texting and driving."

"Well you know what they say You can't teach a gay dog straight tricks. -Chef (South Park)"

"What's the difference between three cocks and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke."

"I gave a Republican an IQ test... He rolled it up and tried to shoot me in the dick with it."

"Apparently typos only become visible to the human eye AFTER you hit send."

"AFTER 69 Q: What comes after 69? A: Mouthwash."

"Chuck Norris was born in the log cabin he built himself."

"My girlfriend asked if I could play wonderwall. I said ""maybe"""

"Wife: Have you seen my stilettos? Me [6 inches taller and struggling to stand]: Uh *stumble* No"