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Joke of the Day

"I've haven't eaten gluten for a week... and I, personally, already feel *so* annoying."

"What does a strawberry and a blueberry have in common? They both can't ride a bicycle!"

"Why shouldn't anybody help cats down a tree? Because they're stuck up"

"A conversation between 2 vegans: ""I'm a vegan."" ""I'm a vegan too."" ""Oh."" ""So...you're a vegan?"" ""Yes, I am a vegan."" ""Me too."""

"The best thing about hand sanitizer in hospitals isn't the hygiene. It's everyone walking around like they're hatching an evil plan."

"What does a lesbian pirate say? Scissor me timbers!"

"There was an explosion at a French cheese factory De brie everywhere."

"3yo: I want to help! Me: You can help by being quiet. 3yo: Me: 3yo: I want to help in a different way!!!"

"Everyone keeps guessing who Rey's parents are, but who delivered her as a baby? OB-Gyn Kenobi"

"My sister bet me 200 dollars I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti... You should've seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!"